So there seems to be this worldwide phenomenon, a way of working towards the ideal you. You can reach utter perfection just by following this simple tip. All you have to do is hate yourself perfect. How on earth can I reach the perfect me I hear you ask? Well I will tell you:
- Feel too fat? Just hate every inch of you that you think is fat!
- Feel too thin? Just hate all the skinniest parts of you, look at each rib in disgust!
- Feel too tall? Look at all of those that are shorter than you and put them higher up than you in worth!
- Feel too pale? Look at yourself in the mirror and point out how disgusting you are
- Feel you aren’t smart? Easy, envy all those that you think are clever and tell yourself you are stupid!
Does the above work well for an advert? No? There is something wrong with this tactic? Are you telling me you wouldn’t go and see a ‘hate yourself perfect’ life coach????? Well there goes that money-making scheme!
The thing is though, nearly everybody uses this technique in some part of their lives to motivate them to change. Here is the thing though:
YOU CANNOT HATE YOURSELF TO IMPROVE!
- You cannot hate yourself healthy
- You cannot hate yourself happy
- You cannot hate yourself beautiful
- You cannot hate yourself to success
For a start each of these goals listed above mean something different to everyone. What you think is beautiful is the complete opposite of beauty to someone else. What you think it means to be healthy is the complete opposite to someone else. What you think it means to be happy is the complete opposite to someone else. What you define as success is the complete opposite to someone else.
Do you see the pattern here?
Truly happy, successful, healthy and beautiful people have certain traits in common:
- They appreciate themselves
- They are attracted to themselves
- They recognise their strengths
- They acknowledge changes they want to make and enjoy working to change.
- They don’t compare themselves to others
- They don’t try to fit in
Hating yourself does one thing – It makes you feel bad. So stop!
Easier said than done right? I mean hating any part of yourself has required work and dedication. It has taken a lot of time and effort. So how can we change this?
We have to start recognising this behaviour as it happens and then we can start to change it. So here is a simple exercise to start doing this. Standing in front of the mirror I want you to look at yourself and say:
I am amazing. I am perfect. I am smart and I am beautiful. I love me.
Now I know that this can be particularly hard to do especially if you don’t believe any of this so if you find it a struggle I want you to imagine you did believe it, imagine how you would feel if you believed all of these. Imagine how you would stand, how you would smile, how you would brush your hair. How you would adjust your clothes. How you would walk past the mirror. Just imagine and then pretend you are that person JUST while you say those statements.
One more exercise I want you to try is one where you can call upon your ILV (Inner Lioness Voice). This one takes a bit more effort in recognising your own thoughts. Every time you hear yourself wishing you were different or putting yourself down I want you to stop and say to yourself
Excuse me, don’t say those things about me, I am wonderful and amazing and shame on you for thinking anything else. Get out of here!
Not only that but I want you to feel annoyed with that other voice, as if it is a person. How dare it try to put you down. That is not a kind thing to do and you won’t stand for it.
Now you are either excited to try this or worried about the amount of voices in my head but just give it a try. Print this out or write down the exercises and just try them. If they don’t work at all then you have lost nothing but you should demand the very best for yourself because you are worth it (sorry Loreal for stealing your tagline).
Admiring your greatness Pride!