The closer you get to all of these the more free and in control you will feel. Doors will open, lights will shine and you will embrace everything with open arms. Even if it’s scary, go for it, be you!
Lovin you for you Pride!
When I was younger all I wanted was to be normal. I wanted to fit in. I didn’t want to be singled out. I wanted to be liked and blend in with everyone.
I didn’t want the bullies to take a shine to me, I didn’t want them to scream in my ears in the playground, circle around my friends so that I would stand alone, make up embarrassing rumours about me, threaten me, start on me or throw the things that hurt me in my face. I didn’t want to be humiliated. I just wanted to be normal. I just wanted to fit in.
When I lost my mum at 13, I didn’t want to be the girl whose mum had just died, I didn’t want everyone to look at me, pity me, know that I was the girl with no mum. I didn’t want to be the talk of the school. I just wanted to be normal. I just wanted to fit in.
As I got older and faced monsters in the shape of grown-ups, I didn’t want to be the damaged woman, I didn’t want to be the one with a troubled childhood, I didn’t want to be the one that came with baggage, I didn’t want to be the one scarred by the actions of people doing wrong, I didn’t want to be pitied and have eyes rolled behind my back. I just wanted to be normal. I just wanted to fit in
But I wasn’t normal.
I felt far from normal and I was FAR from normal. I realised that by hiding how different I was that I was actually crushing my own soul, by trying to be like everyone else I was becoming nobody, by fitting in I was losing any meaning of life.
I am not normal and nor would I want to be, I am the only one of me. Why would I want to be invisible? Why would I want to live my life to be accepted by other people that are no better than me? Why would I base what is ‘right’ on other people’s opinions? Why would I want to hand my worth to someone else when it is the most valuable diamond of this earth?
I wouldn’t. I don’t want to be anyone but me. I don’t want to be anything other than who I am. I don’t want to concern myself with the opinion of ‘they’. I want to be every part of me. I want to feel every drop of my blood feed my body. I want to think every thought that runs through my mind. I want to speak every truth that flows from my heart and I want to be a platform for my soul to give meaning to this world.
I want to live. I want to tell others to live too. I want to help everyone see how completely not normal they really are. I want everyone to know that a light shines in them with colours that no one has ever seen before.
Realising that no part of me is normal is when I truly began to fit in. I fit in to me. To my own skin. To my own world. And it’s fantastic.
Fit in with you!
We are all part of one seriously abnormal Pride fellow Lions and Lionesses!
Forgiveness is about you, not the other person. If someone has disrespected you, hurt you, wronged you or treated you in a way that you don’t deserve it is important to be able to forgive them and not hold on to any anger, however, that doesn’t mean they deserve a place in your life. That doesn’t mean you have to allow them your time or company. That is for you to assess yourself. It is not about holding a grudge or being stubborn, it is about you having standards and boundaries. It is about establishing who deserves your time and who doesn’t. You can love someone without being near them or giving them any time at all. If they do not appreciate you for the magnificent being that you are then why are you wasting your time? Why are you using your energy on them instead of someone who will appreciate you.
You don’t have to go cutting a load of people out of your life but it’s helpful to observe those that are around you and how they treat you, without anger, without resentment, without expectation. Just know what you will and will not tolerate and make no exception! Forgive those who wrong you because they cannot possibly see what is in front of them. But they will, eventually, whether you know it or not…..but that’s none of our business!
Only accepting the best for ourselves Pride!
You are always being shown the way. When something feels right deep down then it is right for you. Sometimes you will be led to challenges and other times to rewards but you will never be led astray by listening to your gut instinct.
This life isn’t supposed to be a straight path on a red carpet covered in rose petals. It is supposed to take you up and down, high and low, far and wide. Go with the flow, be guided through the forest, up the mountains, overseas. Why now? This life is for living right?
We are all headed to the same inevitable ending, what a shame it would be to get there perfectly preserved never having taken a risk. Why is that an important choice? Why is it so necessary to play it safe? If you have answers to these questions that excite you and feel right then sure, go for that route in life, but deep down, if you strive for adventure, for fun, for excitement or for LIFE. Follow your heart, listen to your gut and let your head advise you. Go live an amazing life!