Live as a Lioness

Hey Pride,

 

Sorry I have been gone a while, I’ve been making films and documentaries and all sorts.  So I have attached a link to my vlog on here.  Check it out, then check some more out and let me know what you think!

 

Miss you all Pride!

 

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Ruthlessly forgiving.

Forgiveness is about you, not the other person. If someone has disrespected you, hurt you, wronged you or treated you in a way that you don’t deserve it is important to be able to forgive them and not hold on to any anger, however, that doesn’t mean they deserve a place in your life. That doesn’t mean you have to allow them your time or company. That is for you to assess yourself. It is not about holding a grudge or being stubborn, it is about you having standards and boundaries. It is about establishing who deserves your time and who doesn’t. You can love someone without being near them or giving them any time at all. If they do not appreciate you for the magnificent being that you are then why are you wasting your time? Why are you using your energy on them instead of someone who will appreciate you. 
You don’t have to go cutting a load of people out of your life but it’s helpful to observe those that are around you and how they treat you, without anger, without resentment, without expectation. Just know what you will and will not tolerate and make no exception! Forgive those who wrong you because they cannot possibly see what is in front of them. But they will, eventually, whether you know it or not…..but that’s none of our business!
Only accepting the best for ourselves Pride!

Finding happiness, leave no nook or cranny unturned.

We all want happiness right? We all want to feel that feeling of pure joy spreading through every fibre of our being.

How do we go about doing it? Some will travel, some will party, some will spend time with family or friends, and some will search every nook and cranny for a little taste of the good stuff.

It might be an interview for a job that you really want, so you turn up and do your very best to impress them.

You may be looking for Prince Charming so you scan every corner of every space you move through, making sure you don’t miss the chance to lock eyes with him. You make sure you appear fun and pretty at all times so he will see how worthy you are.

You may want a large circle of friends that adore you so you go out of your way for them and always agree with what they want to do or what they say, because you are ‘easy going like that’.

But has doing any of those things led to true happiness? I doubt it. What it normally leads to is denial. Denial about how little you value yourself, denial about how little you love yourself and denial about how unworthy you really believe you are. Denial then leads to excuses and before you know it you are in a vicious cycle keeping you securely locked into a false sense of happiness whilst you skate across a cracked frozen lake.

If you are going for a job interview, make sure you interview them too, you are going to be putting your time and effort into this company, you need to make sure it is the right place for you to spend so much time. Let them see who you really are, that should be enough alone for them to hire you. Being what you think someone else wants you to be implies you can read minds, you can’t so give it up!

Love isn’t a game of hide and seek, don’t waste your time searching for it. Instead enjoy time with yourself, enjoy being you, every part of you. If you find that hard then try new ways – speak to a counsellor, walk in the park, hug yourself and tell yourself in the mirror how amazing you are. Stop waiting for a man to save you, Prince Charming will find you when you become a Princess and Princesses don’t need anyone else to tell them that they are royal!

If your friends only adore you when you are people pleasing or acting as their servant then they aren’t your friends. True friends want the best for you and give as much as they receive – maybe in different ways but it is a balance nevertheless.  

All this work you put in to convince others you are worth something could be spent on discovering your own worth. Expecting someone else to save you is as beneficial as waiting for a ferry at a bus stop. Put time, money and effort into your self-growth and you will see the things you want so bad are actually manifesting around you naturally.  
Happiness comes from within you!  Find it inside of you and stop looking for someone to save you because you are the only person who can, how exciting!
Standing strong on our feet pride!

It’s right there!

(photo from anonymous source – Facebook)

Nobody can fix our lives for us.

Nobody can tell us the right path for us to walk.

Nobody can tell you what is best for you.

But you can……you can do anything for your life you want to.  You just have to build trust within yourself and follow your heart.

You have the power.  Always have and always will.

Go and trust yourself to live.

Letting you find your own way pride!

Jump on the Express!

(photo from anonymous source – Facebook)

When you are thankful for someone – tell them!

When you think something nice about someone – tell them!

When you miss someone (who deserves it) – tell them!

People like to hear that others are thinking about them and they don’t forget the nice things you say, so say more off them.  Spread kind words and appreciation throughout the world and let’s all feel even more wonderful.

I just want to say that you are all amazing and beautiful and I appreciate each of you. Have an amazing week my wonderful Pride, you are very special.

X

YOU WANT MY ADVICE?

Advice – noun

an opinion or recommendation offered as a guide to action, conduct, etc.: I shall act on your advice

We all turn to our family, friends or colleagues for advice at times. Sometimes we need a few suggestions on how to handle a situation we are faced with and other people can really help us out.

Somehow, with some people and all too often, this advice turns into instruction. A way you ‘should’ be doing something. A lecture.

I hear about this all the time and witness it myself. You start talking to someone about an aspect of your life and almost instantly regret it as you begin to be instructed on exactly what you should do, how and why based on nothing other than that person’s preference or belief. You are no longer considered into this equation of ignorant advice/instruction and you end up trying to look like you are interested whilst thinking of ways to stop this person talking. I have listed below the most popular topics that people often feel like they are instructed on (the list on how to stop them talking can be sent upon request):

  • Pregnancy – All of my friends that have had children have said that one of the worst parts of pregnancy is everyone telling you what you should and should not do with your body. Can you imagine? Forget the labour, swollen ankles or the peeing every 5 minutes being so bad, it is the other people around you that can make it so tiresome. It seems that when you fall pregnant a majority of the people you will come to communicate with will be ready and waiting to share their ‘expertise’ with you. And will they all have the same advice? Oh no, of course not, but they will ALL know best and make sure you know it. If you happen to be pregnant at the moment and are suffering through this torment I feel for you. Nobody really knows best and everyone has their own way of doing things so I think it is important for you to listen to your body and the people you feel happy listening to and tune the others out. Perhaps use the extra need to pee to get the hell outta there and stop them talking…..unless of course they follow you to the toilet and talk outside the door, then, failing you and bump being able to squeeze out of the window, proceed to sticking toilet paper in your ears until you can no longer hear them.
  • Relationships – Well we all like to discuss our relationships with friends when we need to but, there are those certain friends that you instantly regret opening your mouth too. You know the ones, they tell you what you did wrong and what you should be doing instead. They advise you on what you need in your life and it sounds strangely similar to either their current ‘successful’ relationship or similar to the person they think they are but in fact, are not. I’m not talking about the friend that kindly suggests something thinking that referencing themselves may inspire you, I’m talking about the friend who proceeds to lecture you on exactly what you need, what you are ready for, what age you should be, where you should be at in your relationship and how you should feel about it. The phrases ‘you shouldn’t want to settle down yet, you are too young’ or ‘you are mad wanting to meet someone, if I was single I would love it’ or of course ‘he’s a nice man, don’t end it hastily, your feelings will grow’ all because they liked him the one time they met because he complimented her dress. These are the times when it is fully acceptable to think about what you will eat for dinner instead. Nobody knows what is right for you and telling you what you should want or what you should do based on what they want and think they would do isn’t helpful. Suggestions are of course helpful but only when a person considers who you are as part of that, not who they are. If they want to go at it from that approach then the following should be said in that sentence ‘I can only tell you what I would do’ and it should not become an instruction for what you should do.
  • Careers – This is the one I suppose I feel most strongly about. I grew up being told that a ‘real’ job was working for somebody else, that following my dreams was a fairytale and would never get me anywhere. That working part-time in my twenties was me refusing to grow up and that £8 an hour was good money. I have had to battle a lot with other people’s judgements and my own to continue to work towards my dreams. And now, finally I have fully accepted that my life is made for living and dream chasing. It may not be for everyone and their dreams will be different from mine so I say to anyone – do whatever makes you happy and do whatever you feel is right for you. To anyone telling me, you or any other soul how and what they SHOULD be doing in regards to working a ‘real’ job that isn’t, in fact what YOU want to do, I say IGNORE THEM. They don’t have the courage to believe in themselves otherwise they would be encouraging you to believe in yourself too. These negative people want to soul suck you down into their pit of fear and misery so that they are not left alone there. They believed the people who told them the same thing. I want to say I BELIEVE IN YOU, ALL OF YOU. If it doesn’t work the first time, it can work the second or the third or even the three hundred and seventy-fifth time. You can be anything you want to be and do anything you want to do. At least the journey towards doing that will be one hell of an adventure.

It is also good to consider the advice you give others, where does it come from and is it in the best interests of the person you are giving it too, or yourself?

To all of these people who want to give you the rules and instructions for these above mentioned parts of your life and any other parts of your life, I want to share with you a visualisation technique (a practical exercise if you are around those it won’t offend). I was with two of my favourite people on this planet yesterday, Ciara and her husband Dan. Dan was telling us a story about a group of kids driving past his boss and in slow motion one of the kids raised his middle finger at him, his boss shrugged and carried on walking. That was it. It was actually pretty funny by the sounds of it too. But it got us laughing at the idea of using this method when someone is really butting in to your life and telling you what to do. Imagine it, hold up your closed fist and as slowly as you can with a blank expression on your face, raise up your middle finger. I think it makes the perfect point. We named this ‘The slow flip of the bird’. Anyone who starts telling you the ‘rules of life’ or instructions on how you ‘should’ do something, just give them ‘The slow flip of the bird’, perhaps in your head if it is inappropriate to physically do this but do it. Slowly. All the while remember that you can make your own choices and your own decisions about what is right. Listen to your instinct. Your gut is your guideline, always.

Slowly flippin’ the bird at all the preachers and rule-tellers out there, have a great week pride!

Food for thought.

I came across this today and thought it was something to really think about.

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(photo from anonymous source – Facebook)

We never know what pain someone is hiding, what insecurity someone is covering up or what someone’s life is really like behind closed doors. It is not for us to judge them or their behaviour. It is for us to lead by example. To treat others the way we want to be treated. There is always time to help someone out, the universe will make sure of that. So take that time, you might change someone’s life.

Have a good week Pride and if there is anything I can do to help any of you, just let me know!

Let’s hope so!

We all have hope don’t we? We hope for the best, we hope for each other, we hope to win the lottery, hope to be successful and we hope to find love.

Without hope where would we be? Hope leads us, fuels us, makes us strong and keeps us going through dark times. Until hope is lost we don’t give up. We can’t.

Let’s take it down a scale. Think about a friend of yours who has or is wasting all her time on a guy that just does not deserve her. Think how you feel hearing how he treats her bad and she excuses him, justifies his behaviour, cries over him or works out a way to change the situation. Frustrating isn’t it?

Now think of a time that you have lowered your standards for someone who didn’t deserve it…..come on we have all done it. Think about how you kept trying to find a way to make it work. How you told everyone and yourself he wasn’t like the rest of them and you were meant to be. How much the idea of losing him hurt. I am sure you can now sympathise with that friend you just thought of a little more can’t you?

I want you to think about what it was that got you out of there. Made you walk away. I then want you to think about the moment you finally got over them. Moved on. The moment you no longer dreamed about them returning on a white horse and making everything ok again. Why did that happen?

One of the reasons…..because hope was gone.

Not all hope was lost, I am not saying that for a second. We always have hope, but what we hoped for changed. In order for us to move on we have to hope for something else, something better and through that we develop the faith and motivation to seek nothing less.

Every ending can be hard. It can leave us feeling lost, lonely and scared but until we lose the hope, we will still be attached to the situation. So how do we lose hope for a bad situation? If only it were that easy to switch off. Well the answer is quite simple. We will lose it, when we lose it. The quickest way is not to fight it. Allow yourself to pine for someone, cry over someone and wish things could be better, but, acknowledge that it is hope doing that. Hope has to run its course. It has to try out every road and possible way of making things right again.

Give yourself targets. Know that one week from now you will have less hope and therefore feel better. You will also start putting your hope on better things. A sort of ‘hope-transer’ if you will. Let yourself feel every emotion that comes with it but be firm in your decisions. If someone is bad for you don’t give your time to them because you feel alone without them. Let the pain wash through and trust that the hope you have for them will leave and go towards hoping for better things for you. This will motivate you to take better action for yourself.

I have hope for me. I have hope for all of you.

Hoping you have a great week Pride. x

Shine bright like a diamond!

You are everything! Everything you need, everything the world needs and everything beautiful in this world. You are full of greatness, let some of it spill out, go on, even just a pinch. It will change the world.

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